Wednesday, March 31, 2010

i will

This is a silly exercise and it makes me feel dumb.

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

road block

I'm sitting here, in my broken chair and I'm trying to think of something to write. I am at a block. I have no idea what to say, or how to say it. Joyce is gonna be pissed if I keeep not turning anything in, but all I wanna do is watch LOST until I get to go to dinner. I have no motivation.

On the topic of LOST, I have ever told you how much I love Richard Alpert? Those that I watch with know that he has been in my T5 for a long time now. He's been my favorite 'Other' since his introduction. This week's episode, his backstory, wow. Not ashamed to admit that it made me tear up a little. Okay, so cry. Piss off, it was touching.

Wow, this is not my homework.

Sunday, March 21, 2010

@JTeli

I did it. I gave in. I know I have an awful phone so it really doesn't make much sense, but I got a twitter account. And I like it.

Sunday, March 14, 2010

Durk Sided

Was last night a full moon? People's behavior makes me think it may have been.
Work.
I was there. 8-3, but what with the time change it was 8-4, then home by 5. Ouch.
'how could it have possibly taken so long to close the bar?' you may be asking. Let me paint you a picture of the night. 3 large birthday parties, saturday night, lots of shot specials. Some hippie guy with dreads knocked over a table before 11, breaking glass and spilling beer. He left. I cut my finger open on said broken glass. Okay, okay, not so bad. People were just being super rude all night and way too touchy and just overall grossing me out. I had a party of 25 people, there for a birthday, half paying in cash, half on cards, they were mean, I was nicer than I ever am. At the end of the night, the birthday husband closed out his tab, totalling 74 dollars. No tip. Zero. My manager talked to him to see if I did something wrong ( I didn't) so he threw a couple of bucks my way. 8 of them. Yep. The rest of the party didn't tip either. "We'll leave cash on the table." Okay, great, thanks guys, have a good night!
The cash tip? 2million dollars! Oh no, you read that right, 2 million dollar tip! Too bad it was monopoly money. So yeah, I made maybe 15 bucks off of them.
Then we (the barstaff) get to clean up. James (the dj) handed me a shovel and a mop and walked away.
'what's this for?'
'men's room'
.....
Yep. someone had drunkenly shat all over the toilet. and the floor. and the walls. and proceeded to shove half a roll of toilet paper down the thing. Not a strong enough image for you? Try this, have you seen Trainspotting? You know when Ewan McGregor dives in? That bathroom had nothing on this.

So, after a stiff drink, some bleach, rubber gloves, mop, towels, rags, a shovel, bucket and improvised bandit masks, Julia and I took care of it. (there are pictures somewhere)

I have never swallowed so much vomit in my life, but I can guarantee that the men's room at the Mix is the cleanest it has ever been.

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

brain fire

Sometimes I wish I had a Twitter account so that I could update it all the time. I think I'm pretty clever.
Sometimes I have to remind people that I am so clever.
I wonder why they keep forgettting?
Lame.
I just watched 'chronicles of narnia' live on jimmy fallon and I'll bet the extras in that video are tweeting about it.
IE: "andy sandberg just spilled my popcorn!!"
That's what I'd say.
My hair is not long, but my hair is not short.
I have a need for the truth.
I don't like Dr. Phil.
I do like Craig Ferguson.

I've been contemplating being famous lately, I think that'd be nice.
Sushi would also be nice right now. Yum yum.
There is a food place in springtown called 'yum yum bowl', I don't think I'd like to eat there.
Jimmy Kimmel is someone I am a fan of.
I don't really want to go to work today, but I have to. I need some money.
Work is fun, but...
Here are some things:
My name is not a whistle, or a snap of the fingers, or tapping on an empty glass/bottle.
The length of my skirt is up to me to decide, don't touch it.
Don't touch me.

Sometimes I think I should be on a reality show of some sort, we all should.
My friends are funny, attractive, talented and interesting.
The hamster cage is starting to smell.